Thoughts On Fear

If 2013 was a challenging year in terms of learning experiences and deep self-awareness, 2014 is a challenging year in terms of putting it all into practice. It is always really scary for me to come out of my comfort zone, and it is a big source of anxiety, but I gotta do it.

I know fear is unhealthy. I know fear is what stops us from developing our full potential and actually discover what we are really capable of. I think fear is a great obstacle for learning, as mistakes are the experiences that teach you the most. That is the rational part of my brain talking.

Then there's the part of my brain that is just a jerk. It fills me with insecurities. Over the years, it has told me that I am not smart enough, not pretty enough, not thin enough and not capable enough. Sometimes I have listened to it. Other times I have stepped up and given it the finger.

Thanks to overcoming my fears, I have lost a lot. I have lost money, like the time we moved away thinking it was best when it really wasn't. But most importantly, I have lost many barriers that would have stopped me from accomplishing what I have so far. And thanks to overcoming my fears, I have gained confidence, new skills, perspective and pride in myself. Oh and if it wasn't enough, thanks to the time I overcame fear and moved to a country far, far away where I didn't know a single soul, I gained my now husband and a gorgeous toddler.

Don't get me wrong: I feel afraid. Pretty often, actually. I wonder if I am making the right choices in life. I second-guess my parenting all the time. I am afraid of making a big decision and then regretting it a second later. For example, last year I was freaking out on my first day at my job, because my mom is actually my boss and I was terrified of doing a crappy job and letting her down. Life is scary. So many things can happen that can turn it upside down.

But I keep taking risks regardless, and telling the jerk in my brain to STFU. It makes life more interesting, and I'd much rather live an interesting life than a safe one. It is brave to do something risky. It is brave to stand up after falling and say "I will try again tomorrow". That's where the greatest things in life happen. Life has big and little mistakes. It has ups and downs. We just better make sure not to miss the "ups" by wallowing in the "downs".

I remember in 2005 I was the valedictorian for my High School graduation. I read my speech and finished with a quote by Robert Frost that has stuck with me ever since, and it is one that I keep going back to when times are hard: "In three words I can sum up everything I have learned about life: it goes on." So much wisdom in those three little words! No matter how badly you screw up, life will go on. Tomorrow will come. Let it find you ready to take on the world, to take a new risk, to start what you have always wanted to do (perhaps apply for a new job? ask for a promotion? book that holiday? ditch that toxic friend?).

Your 90 year old self will thank you for it.

Sean's Wednesdays v.2: Bacon & Egg Breakfast Pies

Hello, everyone!

Sean here, with another treat for your pallets!

Bacon and Egg Breakfast Muffins

If you prefer to make your own dough, or don't have a store-bought dough available, here is a recipe for you:

Ingredients:
- 300 gr flour
- 130 gr butter
- 2 tbsp water
- 1 tsp salt

Mix the ingredients into a ball, and set in a fridge for 15 minutes. I prefer to pinch some sugar into the mix too but each to their own.

Once the dough is made, you will need to make the filling and prepare the pies, for which you will need:

For each pie:
- 1 egg
- 1 tbsp milk
- 2 mushrooms
- 150 gr bacon (or substitute for spinach, for a vegetarian option!)

Step 1: On a chopping board, prepare your bacon and mushrooms and have your dough on standby.

Step 2: Take some of the dough and roll it out on the surface. Evenly use a rolling pin to stretch the dough out into thin circles of 15cm (6 in). Press the dough into the mould carefully and try not to rip the dough as you get it into the corners. Get your eggs and break them in together with 2 tablespoons of milk and stir.

 Step 3: Light up a stove and fry your bacon and mushrooms in a pan with a dash of olive oil and sea salt. Fry off for no more than 3min and remove from the pan directly into your egg mix in the pastry mould.

Step 4: Roll out a separate piece of the dough as a lid, make sure its flat and thin.

Step 5: Firmly place the top on and pinch the sides before putting the pies in the oven.

Step 6: Once in the oven, baked for 15 to 20 minutes. Take them out and let them cool.

Final Step: Please make sure they are cooled before you take them from the mould. Oh, and lift the lid to peek at the egg to make sure its cooked.

I hope you enjoyed this recipe and remember that there will be something delicious coming your way every Wednesday, so stay tuned!

Friday At Home (Or New Parent) Playlist

Source

When you become a parent, Friday nights are pretty much confined to the house. You can't just go out and party every week, and on the odd day that you have someone to look after your kid, the thought of having to wake up with him at 6:00 am, with the worst hangover, is enough to stop you in your tracks. Since stay-at-home Friday nights become the norm, you are going to want to vary it every once in a while, and that's how you end up with two kinds of Fridays: the ones where you just want to chill out, open a bottle (or two) of Rosé and have a nice meal before watching a movie with your partner. And then you have the ones when you really feel like going out but can't, so you invite some friends over, and get in "faux-party" mode.

That is what prompted me to develop two separate playlists: one for the relaxing mode and the other for partying mode, to really help set the mood and make us feel a little better that our Fridays have pretty much been spent within four walls for the last three years. So this is what we have been listening too lately, depending on what kind of Friday it is:


CHILL-OUT-FRIDAY PLAYLIST:

• It's time (Imagine Dragons)
• Royals (Lorde)
• Fast Car (Tracy Chapman)
• The City (The 1975)
• How Long Will I Love You (Ellie Goulding)
• Can't Remember To Forget You (Shakira feat. Rihanna)
• The Man (Aloe Blacc)
• Not Giving In (Rudimental)
• Ready For Anything (Landon Austin)
• Make It To Me (Sam Smith)
• Little Talks (Of Monsters And Men)
• Give Me Love (Uncle Jed)
• This Year (Meghan Tonjes)
• Please Don't Say You Love Me (Gabrielle Aplin)
• Just Give Me A Reason (Pink)
• No Ordinary Thing (Op Shop)
• Cool Me Down (The Black Seeds)
• Viva La Vida (Coldplay)
• Somebody Loves You (Betty Who)

PARTY-FRIDAY PLAYLIST:

• DJ Got Us Fallin' In Love (Usher feat. Pitbull)
• Timber (Pitbull feat. Ke$ha)
• Wake Me Up (Avicii)
• Don't You Worry Child (Swedish House Of Mafia)
• Red Lights (Tiësto)
• Hey Porsche (Nelly)
• Feel This Moment (Pitbull feat. Christina Aguilera)
• Under Control (Calvin Harris)
• Take Me Home (Cash Cash feat. Bebe Rexha)
• Thank You (MKTO)
• Without You (David Guetta feat. Usher)
• Wild Ones (Flo Rida feat. Sia)
• I Love It (Icona Pop)
• Good Time (Owl City & Carly Rae Jepsen)
• I Could Be The One (Nicky Romero & Avicii)
• Just One Last Time (David Guetta)
• Dance Again (Jennifer Lopez feat. Pitbull)
• Titanium (David Guetta feat. Sia)

What do you like to listen to on those Fridays when you find yourself at home?

OOTD: Chilly Evenings

When the weather starts getting chilly, I have a sort of "uniform" I love to wear: a girly dress, basic tights and boots. It is very simple, yet you look tidy and put together without too much effort, while being warm enough to be outside. It isn't exactly chilly here, but I was very much in the mood to wear this (albeit for only 5 minutes), since I haven't been able to wear my boots for many, many months.

I like keeping accessories simple and feminine with this look: a little chain and matching earrings from Forever 21, and a stone bracelet I bought last month on our trip to Mexico. 

I have a big obsession at the moment with all things coral, and I like the pop of color this dress brings to the entire look. Keeping everything else in neutral colors ensures that the focus stays on the dress. I also love how the color of the dress complements the sunset and the green lot we were visiting. 

After a while, Tommy wanted to be featured too. He enjoyed being the centre of attention when I did his photo shoot last week and didn't want to be left out this time around:

Another great thing about this look is that when the weather starts warming up, it can be turned into a summer outfit in three easy steps (which I did a minute after the photos): pull your hair up in a bun, take off the leggings, switch the boots for some comfy flats, and done!

Friday Roundup: Funny YouTube Videos

Continuing with the trend we started last week, every Friday I will pick a theme and compile a list of useful, funny or interesting Internet finds. Today's turn is for the videos that have made me laugh the loudest lately (No, no funny cats in here!):


1. Sean can tell you just how obsessed I am with Ellen. So, naturally, she comes first with this gem:

2. Even "Mr.-I'm-so-serious" Sean was laughing out loud with this one:

3.  The funniest (saddest?) part about this next video is that this could totally happen to me:

4. I mean, if you are going to commit a crime, at least be smart about it!

5. And to think my husband was so lame to propose to me on one knee!!  I'm claiming my money back!!

This is great, because whenever I am feeling a little down I can always come back to this and it will instantly lift my mood. I mean, who doesn't feel instantly better knowing that as bad as things may seem, they at least haven't burned their hair off?

Woman's Body Language And How To Decode It

Body language can say so much more than words. And this is never truer than when it comes to women. We have become masters at disguising the true meaning of our words and expressing them instead with our body language and stares. However, more often than not, men don't get the hint and before they know it, they have awoken that terrifying wrath that lives within every woman. All because he thought that when his wife said she didn't need help bathing the kids, cooking dinner and setting the table all at once while he was watching sports, she really meant it.

If more guys knew what their wives / girlfriends really mean when they say something, it might just save them an argument or two. All  that guys need to do is memorize some general rules so they learn to identify when they are on the verge of unleashing their partners' fury. For example:

1. You ask if it's okay that you go to poker night with your buddies for the tenth time that month. Your wife says "Fine".

Rule 1: If she says "fine" like it's four syllables instead of one, it's most definitely NOT fine.
Rule 2: If she only half-smiled, or rolled her eyes, or gave you a blank stare while saying "fine", don't you dare leave the house.


2. You make an "innocent" joke about your girlfriend in front of your friends (or worse: your family!). She smiles.

Rule: If she smiled, but didn't actually laugh, you are in major, major trouble. 
Rule 2: If she didn't look at you for the next minute or so after the joke, you can be sure you'll be sleeping on the couch that night.
Rule 3: Hell, if the joke was in front of your family, forget the previous rules. You are in big trouble regardless, you poor, poor man!  (Sean learned this one the hard way!)


3. She is talking to you while you are doing something else. Suddenly she realizes it, and stops.

Rule: She is not being considerate, you moron! She is counting to ten, trying not to murder you on the spot for not paying attention to her. Stop whatever you are doing immediately, look her in the eye and express time and time again how interested you are in whatever it is that she is saying. Try and repeat some of the words she said, to make it more believable. If she walks away, follow her or you are a dead man. 


4. You made some constructive criticism to her cooking/singing/dancing/insert-verb-here skills.  She didn't seem to mind because she didn't say anything.

Rule: Make no mistake: silence is NEVER a good sign coming from women! we love to talk! What it means is that she is taking her time gathering a plethora of arguments against you. Take immediate action: the longer you leave her, the more arguments she will have to prosecute you, and you will never (trust me!) hear the end of it. So start apologizing and complimenting her excessively (make it believable, otherwise this is counterproductive!). 


5. She seems a little off, so you ask if everything is ok, and she says "yes".

Rule 1: If she said "yes" while not looking at you, it means "no".
Rule 2: If her"yes" was rather annoyed, it clearly means "no".
Rule 3: If it took her more than three seconds to say "yes", it means "no".
Rule 4: If instead of "yes" she snaps "why wouldn't I be?" that means "Are you serious!? you have some nerve asking me that! you should know full well that no, I am not ok, and you won't be in a while either!".


6. Your very loud, Edward-fortyhands-playing friend has invited you two over to his, let's say, interesting home. You ask your girlfriend if that sounds good and she replies with "If you want to..."

Rule: If it wasn't a very enthusiastic "if you want to..." then she doesn't. 
Rule 2: If she did want to, she would add something like "absolutely, if you want to!", or "sure, if you want to!" or an equivalent. Not a plain "if you want to...".  (Still hoping Sean will learn this one... maybe after reading this post?). 


Conclusion: Guys should probably learn a bit more about body language. Girls need to learn that men are literal creatures, and will take their words at face value. So, coming from someone who has had one too many fights over miscommunication issues, maybe next time you will just want to say "No" flat out, instead of expecting him to get it from your death stare... and he might want to learn that no, it's not ok to tell his mom all your "funny" anecdotes that time you had one too many vodka cruisers.

Sean's Wednesdays v.1: Chocolate Rocks

I am very, very excited to present to you my new series: Sean's Wednesdays!

I have mentioned before that Sean is an excellent cook: he loves creating yummy dishes, scrumptious desserts and sophisticated cocktails. He truly is a kitchen whiz (or maybe it just seems to me that way because I am hopeless at it, but stay with me). Imagine my delight when last week, while sharing a pizza, he informs me that he would love to be a contributor to my blog, with a weekly food and drink segment! My own hubby wants to be a part of my blog! I am so proud!

So without further ado, let's welcome Sean, a great cook and even better man. Every Wednesday he will share something delicious here on the blog for your tasting pleasure, starting today with this awesome cocktail recipe.

Hi, guys, Sean here.
First off, this is a cocktail that is so versatile and easy to throw together! It's shaken in this demonstration, but you can also just build it in a tall glass.

First you will need:

- Ice
- Bailey's
- Rum Cream (Can be Kahlua or Frangelico or another Irish cream of your choice)
- Milk
- Chocolate sauce
- Liquid Honey
- Cocktail shaker (or any substitute)

First, take your shaker and add ice. Then pour about 30 - 40 mls (1 - 1.3 oz) of the Rum cream followed by 45 - 60mls (1.5 - 2 oz) of the Bailey's. Add honey and shake for a few minutes to chill the mix.

Take your glass and gently add chocolate sauce to the inside of the rim of the glass, rotating it slowly. Now pour the mixture from the shaker and add milk to where the chocolate circles the top of the glass.

Give it a little stir to finish it off. Feel free to add whipped cream or more chocolate sauce, or why not sprinkle some chocolate chips on top!

Serve this on a hot Summer afternoon or grab a sneaky mug of it at brunch. A great hit for entertaining is serving it in a large pitcher and share with some friends. And if it is cold where you are, you can try a hot version too! (just hit up the milk, and it's done!).

I hope you enjoyed this first Sean's Wednesday and feel free to suggest any of your favorite drinks and recipes for upcoming posts!