Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Letter to my High School Self

Dear High-school self:

I am eight years older than you now, and I want to let you in on ten secrets that I have learned, and that I'm sure will surprise you. Hopefully with this list you can stop stressing so much about where your life is going and exactly when you are going to get married, and all those things that I know you secretly obsess over at night (come on, you are only seventeen!):

1. That handsome boy that tried to kiss you the other day and you thought he was gross? Well, let me tell you, young lady, that you two are going to fall madly in love,  and you'll dream about marrying him every waking second... and then poof! all of a sudden, out of nowhere, during your exchange in Germany, you will stop feeling that way and will end it amicably.  

2. You really should wear that retainer of yours more often! Naughty girl! Because of you, now I walk around life with crooked bottom teeth!

3. You will actually hang out with some pretty cool girls at college. Soon you will all be referred to as "the henhouse". And no, you still can't keep your mouth shut in class.

4. Your dream of becoming an actress isn't really going to happen. You will be about to quit college to study acting but you will realize that it's not for you just in time.

5. Surprisingly, you will become a completely obsessed beauty product hoarder! You can barely remember to put moisturizer on, and I know how much you hate it, but soon enough you will be spending a third of your paycheck on them (or wishing you did!).

6. Life has an incredible man in store for you. No, it's not the one you think. He is actually on the other side of the world right now, playing rugby and eating fish and chips.

7. But wait, before he comes you will have to spend quite a fair amount of time with a frog. Please don't do it!!!  You will see that it's precious time that you wasted and now you can never get back!! 

8. I know that you keep thinking about how much you would like to be a mummy one day, but you are pretty sure you are going to have trouble falling pregnant when the time comes. Ha! First month without the pill and bam! there comes your little bundle of joy.

9. I know you say that reading and writing are the lamest things to do on earth, (although you secretly still love reading) but there will come a time when that is all you will want to do all day and you will start planning how to make a living out of writing. 

10. The very first time (of, erm, a few times) you crash your car, don't freak out. I know you will anyway, but the whole damage is going to cost only around $180 and will be easily fixed, and you would have overreacted big time!

17-year-old me:

25-year-old me:

What would you say to your High School self?

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